What's funny about water, food, and shelter? Nothing, those are essential necessities to live your life, unless you have chains attached to your ankles with bricks on the other end and you're thrown in the middle of the ocean with no chance what so ever

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

What did the Police Officer do after he made a positive identification of a Prostitute? He proceeded to pay her in cash for sexual favors because prostitution is legal in the state of Nevada

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

What do you call a deaf-black man that professionally generates maps of the world? A cartographer.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

What would EARTH without ART be? EARTH, you dummy.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon..... so he can eat it.

I'm so full I could stop eating.

So a woman walks into a store... There's a lamp selling for $5.99. She buys it because she thinks that's a pretty good deal.

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

how did the girl die? she read all of your terrible anti-jokes.

What would Steve Jobs be doing today if he were alive? Dying.

Q. What did Michael Jackson say to the banana? A. Nothing, he's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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