What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whant to hear my best inpression of a hijacking ok kjgnkdgsjikdfhjnknkdfngknhfkfbnkf

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You can tell I have many friends because I got them to like this.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

My computer will die soon, and my life is a lie. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Why are all black people fast? A: Because the slow ones are in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did one dinosaur say to the other? "rawr"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

An man walked into a bar. Unbeknownst to him, the bar happened to be a having a Rave party. The man, having epilepsy, proceeded to have a seizure. Luckily, a paramedic was there and saved his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock whos there telephone telephone who telephone refiridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Banana you glad I didn't say 'Orange?'"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do stupid fat ugly women always say to me? “I think you have a problem with women.”

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than having sex with your hot cousin? Not having sex with your hot cousin...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should? Fly halfway across the world when the environment turns hostile.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

It's long!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So Nero, what the fuck are you doing? XD

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you get if you cross a centipede with a millipede? I don't know but it sure has a lot of legs

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops