Roses are red Violets are blue ... Uhhhh I don't think anyone knows the rest of this!!!!!!

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What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? You hit it with an axe.

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A jewish man trips and breaks his nose

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anti jokes are like chickens. they arent funny at all. which makes them funny...

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Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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Where did the people go after the bomb went off? EVERYWHERE!!!

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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Q. If you have 4 pencils and I have 7 apples, how many pancakes can we fit on the roof? A. Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

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You will NEVER guess what just happened!

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what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a fish? A dead fish.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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I grunt when I poop.

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What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

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Your momma so fat, she's fat

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Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

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I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

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Your mother is so stupid that she claimed the pole ran into her.

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A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

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why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

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How many gay men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. He was happy to do it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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