How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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Most people like to drink beer, others do not.

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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What is duke oxtoby? legend.

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What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

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Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

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How do you get a black guy to learn how to read? Find a stolen book and tell them that it's the recipe for the spices in fried chicken.

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

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Why did the old lady have a heart attack? She got raped by a giraffe.

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While I was having sex... Just kidding, I can't get laid.

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You're a frog

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Hail Heetluh

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Rex Ryans foot fetish was honer by Mark Sanchez when he threw the ball at his teammates feet.

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What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

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Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

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What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

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Who is happpier than the grouch about the Zombie Apoclypse? Dora.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? Jenga games regularly don't kill around 3000 people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops