What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

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A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

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Why did the frog commute suicide ? Because His mother was a type writer

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Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

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The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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Why didn't the Hispanic die in the bus explosion? Because he was at home playing with his children when it happened.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What do you call a magic MAAAAAAAAAAAN? A magic man

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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Penis

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

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yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

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What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

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What's the capital of Ohio? O

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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