How do you confuse a blond? Look at her

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There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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What are the seven wonders of Kentuky cows,drugs,liquor,moutain due,moster trucks,shot guns and trucks oh and I for got Crackle barrle.

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

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I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

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What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

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Q: Why did the black man have a gun? A: We was recently indicted for insider trading and preferred suicide to a long prison sentence.

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why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

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How many Ethiopians can you fit in a car? Five in your standard sedan

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Why did the boy drop his iceccream?? He got hit by a bus??

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Whats funnier then two babies falling off a cliff? 2 babies falling off a cliff

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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how do you finish a 30000 piece puzzle you search for cheat codes

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What did Mr. Sandman do whrn the boy asked for one too many dreams, nothing because Mr. Sandman was the boys bitch.

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What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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I have Alzheimer's, i pee out gold, racoons

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How did Steve Jobs die? Of cancer, in a bed, and surrounded by his loved ones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops