My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: What did the priest say to the small child. A: Rite?

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Can everyone please stop posting shit about my girlfriend because it seriously isnt cool.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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An Englishman, an Irishman, a Frenchman, a Scottish man, an Australian, a German, a Spaniard, an Icelandic man, a Norwegian, a Swede, a Dane, an Italian, a Morrocan, an American, an Algerian, an Egyptian, a Syrian, an Israelite, a Chinese man, a Russian, a Japanese man, an Indian and a Brazilian all walk into a bar. It was a large bar.

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What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

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What she says: “You’re really sweet, but I have a boyfriend.” What she means: “You’re really sweet, but I definitely don’t want to date you.”

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What do you call Willy Wonka when he is in Colorado? Willy Colorado.

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How do you make someone cry? Shit on them

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Who kille the Mockingbird? George Bush: i wish i could know the answer for this question, but belive me i am thinking.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He threw at the girl, and that's why she fell off the swing.

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Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

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Well this is pointless.....

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Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

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How did Steve Jobs die? Of cancer, in a bed, and surrounded by his loved ones.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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White boy in jail. "That ish crazy!!"

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman.

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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Roses are red violents are blue I have 5 figures and the middle one is for you

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whats the difference between a turkey and a baby i dont know how to cook a turkey

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

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Where are the first Cannibals in the Bible? A. 2 Corinthians 8:1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops