stuarts mum

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Suzy:I love you like a fat man love cake. Dave:(proceeds to say nothing as he is fat and is buzzy eating cake)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happen to the girl that did the splits. Her legs broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

sweating like antoni with a girl

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What eats grass and goes MMMMOOOOOOO? A weird person that likes to eat grass and MMMMOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -10

German bedtime story: There once was a boy who liked to suck his thumbs. His mother told him to stop, but he wouldn't. So she cut of his thumbs. Now he has none. Goodnight.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what's red and horny a red unicorn

thumb_up thumb_down -10

2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are trapped on a desert island. As they investigate the island to find food and shelter they find a magic lamp. Together they rub the lamp and sure enough a genie appears and tells them he will grant each of them a single wish. The brunette goes first and wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house, where her husband and children are waiting for her. She is happy that her ordeal is behind her and to see her loved ones. The redhead goes next and also wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house. She is not married and has no kids, but she has 2 cats. She is happy to be through her ordeal and to see her beloved pets. The blonde went last and also wished to be sent home. The genie clapped his hands and she appeared back in her house. She wasn't married, and had no kids or pets, but she was still happy that her ordeal was over.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what happens when you put nina and harry in the same room. Nina will die instantly of shock

thumb_up thumb_down -10

-Why didn't a girl cry after she fell down with her bike? -Because a handlebar pinned her lung.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Who keeps his best friend in a gun rack? a red neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the black man go to the store? To get milk and eggs because he was running out of those items

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the Teacher cry? Because he was sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: whats worse than ten babies in one trash can A: one baby in ten trash cans

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops