What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

A black man and a mexican are falling off a cliff. Who lands first? The police officer.

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked.

Knock Knock Who's there? The FBI. We need to check your house for dead bodies.

What do you call a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest flying a plane? A pilot with a bomb strapped to his chest

Once there was a frog. My parents died.

I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

Thats what she said

Okay I have knock knock joke but u have to start it. Okay Knock knock Who's there (akward silence)

What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

What did the business man say to the homeless person? Get a job

Two muffins are sitting in the oven. One says wow its hot in here the other muffin said HOLY SHIT ITS A TALKING MUFFIN

Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

Tic tac toe. I never met my father

Why couldn't the dead man take a shit? He was severely constipated

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

You think I'm pretty without any makeup boy..... Let's bang.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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