Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it did not realize it was a man-made distinction for constructed transportation vehicles and had a coincidental tendency to walk toward the area on the other side to find food or avoid birds flying over.

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Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

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a boy put a blanket oveer his head one night... He was warm for the rest of the night

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What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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What do you call a black guy riding a unicycle? A black guy riding a unicycle.

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Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

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I don't like Holocaust jokes. Anne Frankly they offend me,

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Your mom is so poor that she can't even pay attention.

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My period is red, Your sauce is white, now pull down your pants and let me do my workout.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

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What's worse then your mouse running away? Getting hit by a plane

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Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

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So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

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You think I'm pretty without any makeup boy..... Let's bang.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Tic tac toe. I never met my father

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Why couldn't the dead man take a shit? He was severely constipated

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

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A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

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What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

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Knock Knock Who's there? The FBI. We need to check your house for dead bodies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops