What s the difference between a pigeon ?

What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

White boy in jail. "That ish crazy!!"

what goes in hard, comes out soft, and you blow on it? bubble gum!

Q:Where was The Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom

How do you drown a fish? You don't...

What is blue and on the bottom of the pool. A drowned baby

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

Why do I hate food? I don't.

Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

if life gives you the back.. TOUCH HER ASS

Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

Why was the little girl crying? Her parents got divorced yesterday.

Why did the man go bra shopping? Cause he is a single father and his teenage daughter needs a new one.

Whats green and smells like grass? Grass scented air freshener, in a green colored can.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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