Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than walking into a lampost? Your seven year old child accidentally finding and watching a sex tape that you made years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the Hardest part of helping a grandma who has having trouble crossing the road? Picking the gravel out of the wrinkles in her knees.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did one jew say to the other? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Fine, this better be worth it, this is no time to be a jackass Nero.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the chicken cross the road? because his mother was dieing of terminal cancer in the hospital across the street where the bar was. he was drinking because he is an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did sally drown cause she was black

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats the square root of pie? Pies are round.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I woke up today

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you stop a baby from making bad grades? You throw a javelin at its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the black man smoking marijuana with his friends? He was at a glaucoma support group meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The Game.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock! Who's there? The mailman! The mailman who? *opens door* Just kidding, I'm actually an axe-murderer!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops