knock knock no ones home

how do you know when you're a man? massive erection.

What's black and white and red all over? An equality parade with a nearby homicide

How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

why did the packers win the superbowl? because they were very good

What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

your moms my other ride

Your mom is so fat she could consider going on biggest loser, where she might be able to make a lot of money.

What did the chickens say to the other chicken Go away mother clucker

Two People runs into a bar. They were thirsty.

whats worse than 2 people dying? 3 people dying.

What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

Q:Why do black people wear fitted caps? A: So pigeons don't shit on their lips.

A man walks into a bar

Why did the mother get upset with her son? Because he sexually experimented with his cousin.

You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

Like to tell patrick porcupine to stop gaming

What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

A man walks into a bar. He is followed by a chicken, 2 donkeys, a tiger, 7 cardinals, 3 horses, 11 chipmunks, and 2 squirrels. And they all lived happily ever after. THE END

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...