You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

what's red and horny a red unicorn

Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

"Do you know the joke No me neither?" "No..." "Me neither..."

Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cause he was a chicken.

yo mamas like a chicken hut all the cock* fly in

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

White boy in jail. "That ish crazy!!"

what goes in hard, comes out soft, and you blow on it? bubble gum!

What s the difference between a pigeon ?

A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

How do you drown a fish? You don't...

Q:Where was The Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom

What is blue and on the bottom of the pool. A drowned baby

a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

Why do I hate food? I don't.

Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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