what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

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What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A1: he was shot. A2: he died A3: the forest was being cut down and he got into a machine and was shredded to pieces A4: he fell asleep

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

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What is the definition of “making love”? Something a woman does while a guy is f-ing her.

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw it after I chopped its' head off.

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YES! EXACTLY!

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OOOOPPS /

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robin, get in the car.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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What do you call a Mexican playing basketball? A man of hispanic heritage that enjoys the sport of basketball.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

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how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

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Q: What's that white, sticky stuff on your mom? A: Glue

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What did the priest say to the Atheist when he walked into the church? How are you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops