What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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You and your parents are going to die today

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A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

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Bariande: I have a belly button Kraken: haha who doesnt? MissAwkward: i dont Barinade: neither do i. haha this happened on tiny chat.

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What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Your mother's so fat.....When she gets on the scale, it tells her how much she weighs

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

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Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

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What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

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Hey, did u know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans By: Trey & Trenton of Texas

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Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did you fall? Because of my buttcrack.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retatrded

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Q: What is black and can't support a family? A: A bowling ball

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a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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