What did the devout Catholic man say to his gay neighbours who just got married? "Congratulations!"

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

black people

Who has, there are like... Well actually I might have watched them all, downloaded them in a torrent... A LEGAL torrent of course... NOT. Well, you get a hint, it looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, and its a trick question since Mickey Mouse was not actually drawn by Disney, so yeah.

Q: What is worse than getting stung by a bee? A: Your breath. Please have a mint.

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. It burnt up on re-entry

Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

What is black, white, and red all over? Rape.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

Church.

what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

Why did the lion eat food Because seaweed is green

no

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

Why can't a dinosaur clap its hands? Dinosaurs are extinct.

Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

What did the hispanic guy say after he took a bite out of a McDonald's hot n' spicy chicken sandwhich. I'm lovin' it.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

What's worse than kissy face pictures on facebook? The porn pictures on facebook.

Knock, knock Who's there? I'm there.

Q: What did the Black Man say to the Mexican Fellow Guy? A: Hello.

jack and jill went up the hill to have a little fun. that dumb ass jill forgot the pill and now they have a son

How old is george washington? anyway thats not the point your pregnant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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