knock knock whose there? my penis.

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Asians

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Why couldn't the rich dumbass get into colledge? He couldn't open the door

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Q. Why is me question not funny? A. Because there is no point to it.

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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Q: How do you make babies cry? A: Throw a brick at it's face.

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A duck walks into a bar.... Duck: Can I have a glass of water? Bartender: How would you like to pay for it? Duck: Put it on my bill

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

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What is black, white, and red all over? Rape.

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what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

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Why did the lion eat food Because seaweed is green

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

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Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

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no

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Church.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Falafel. Falafel who? I falafel. You feel awful? Ha, ha, ha! Oh, what a kneeslapper! Oh, God! Thanks for the laugh, I was feeling a little down and I... No, I just meant I ate a falafel. Oh. Yeah.

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What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

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1st person: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? 2nd person: I don't know 1st person: A Jew is a follower of the zionist faith and a pizza is a popular food invented in Italy and comes with your choice of several delicious toppings. 2nd person: But not all Jews follow zionism 1st person: Well some places restrict your choice of toppings. Whats your point?

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What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

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Why are pineapples yellow? 82, piano, bomb, lamp!

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What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

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What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops