how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

thumb_up thumb_down -30

your moms fat. she's ugly too.

thumb_up thumb_down -84

The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

thumb_up thumb_down -104

how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

this site is funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

japan4.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the black guy punch the Mexican guy? Because they were in a fight.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is Ash gray Battleship gray Black Blue-gray Cadet gray Charcoal Cool gray Davy's gray Payne's gray Gunmetal Silver Slate gray Taupe Purple taupe Medium taupe Rose quartz Taupe gray Timberwolf WhiteApple green Asparagus Bright green Cal Poly Chartreuse Dark olive green Dark spring green Dartmouth green Fern green Forest greenGreen Green-yellow Harlequin Honeydew Hunter green India green Islamic green Jungle green Lawn green LimePhthalo green Pigment green Pine green Pistachio Sea green Shamrock green Spring bud Spring green Teal Yellow-greenAlice blue Aqua Aquamarine Celeste Cerulean Cyan Electric blue Jungle green Magic mint MintAir Force blue Air superiority blue Alice blue Azure Baby blue Bleu de France Blue Blue-gray Bondi blue Brandeis blueAmethyst Byzantium Cerise Eggplant Fandango Fuchsia Heliotrope Indigo Lavender blush Lavender (floralblack gray silver white maroon red purple fuchsia green lime olive yellow navy blue teal aqua a List that you just spent 5 min reading

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +104

Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

thumb_up thumb_down +42

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops