Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

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A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

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Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

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Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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haha ur single hahahahahhahahahhahaahahhaahaha i am 2

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what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

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Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

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Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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