why did Stevie Wonder run a stop sign? he was changing his CD's and missed it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

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Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

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what do you say when you see a winner weaner

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A seal walks into a club...

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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lol this is the best joke ever!

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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A fat man takes a crap, it looked like something a rhino would curl out.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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