How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

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A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

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Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

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Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

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There are two muffins in the oven. One muffin says to the other "phew it's kinda hot in here" the other muffin says "AWW a talking muffin!"

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How much stuff would a stuff muff huff if a stuff muff could huff stuff? Whole dang lotsa

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Why did the girl drown? Well, the girl probably did drown because she was within the ages of 3-5 years old, and she probably had a physical incapapbilty and she could not swim so her parents didn't save her.

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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Never mail in your wishes to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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Invisible Television.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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why did Stevie Wonder run a stop sign? he was changing his CD's and missed it.

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How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

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An irishman walks out of a pub

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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