What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

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You say: Why did the chicken cross the road? Response: Why? (or some other answer to a different joke) You say: To get to your house! Knock, knock. Response: Who's there? You say: The CHICKEN!!!!

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A horse walks into a bar, but is kicked out because animals are not allowed in that bar.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, quite strange to enjoy when you're single.

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What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

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yo mama is so fat that wii fit puts her in the overweight category

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What did the pencil say to the pen? Nothing.

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Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

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the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

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Why did the man and woman have sex? To have a good time, but the man's condom failed and they ended up with a deformed baby because they were brother and sister. Those are your parents. Enjoy

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What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

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Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but i have Alzheimer's. Hey i just met you.

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why wont our kids have time to socialize? because theyll all be too busy trying to find a solution for global warming.

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What did death say to life? Go die

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your mom is so fat, she uses nutrisystem and other weight-loss systems to try to loose weight.

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why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

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Okay, an ambulance is arriving for me (cops called it whatever I am fine) If you are still reading this then get the fuck out before I fire you no more messages.

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. Your mom is the punchline.

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What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

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A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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