how does your hair keep changing lengths? due to my countless hours of grueling sessions in chemotherapy due to what was recently found as a terminal cancer, i wear wigs

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

A christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walked into a bar... Then the Muslim shoots the Jew and blows himself up.

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

Whats white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

My arms get tired from carrying my big diick everywhere, well at least it's better than dragging it

You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

Win industrial estate, Newry

What did the Little 8 year old boy do when a big black man walked into his house? He said "Hi daddy", then they happily ate dinner together.

Kevin: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Bob: Because it's extinct? Kevin: No you idiot! The P is silent! Pterodactyl: RAARRGHH! (eats Bob)

your mom is so ugly when she entered an ugly contest they said... ok

Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

Yesterday I was walking my dog and while I was walking my dog, guess what happened? It got hit by a bus.

A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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