Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

Two octopuses are swimming in the ocean. Suddenly a scuba diver spots one of the octopus. The octopus looks at the human and swims away.

Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

where did susan go durring the explotion? every where...

- Knock, knock - Who's there? - Police - I'm not home!

Well, there's one way...

Punching a baby

Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

Why did Hunter cross the road? No one cares, unless he gets hit.

What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

Q: Whats black and white and red all over? A: I am unsure for I am color blind.

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

What's sad about a dead person? He was my friend.

How do you stop your baby crawling in circles? Pick it up and smother it.

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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