i love weed i fuc king really do i fuc king love smoking weed with you.And i love a fat spliff and i love a fat bong why cant we all just sing along!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There were three men in a race: Crap, Manners, and Shut Up. During the race, Crap fell and Manners stopped to pick him up, Shut Up kept on speeding. The police stopped him. Here is there converstation: Police 1: Whats your name? Shut Up: Shut Up Police 2: Wheres your manners? Shut Up: Back there picking up crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black man and his mexican friend walk into a bar. The black man orders a drink and the mexican gets soda. He is the designated driver

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two guys walk into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q:Why do black people wear fitted caps? A: So pigeons don't shit on their lips.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Sometimes I wonder; why is that frisbee getting closer? Then it hits me. Someone just threw a frisbee at me.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why weren't the two gays invited to the office party? Because there is no office party until december, therefor no one was invited.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Has u seen my grammar?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you kill Chuck Norris. Shoot him in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He was in a terrible car crash in which the fuel tank exploded.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the Islamic woman killed? She insulted Allah.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the elephant not do 9/11? Because he drank a hispanic turtle.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar, but it was a gay bar, and the man was a homosexual so he stayed and had fun then later that night he went home to his girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm chuck norris. And I approve of this message.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what makes reed stop talking? LYRENS SHARPENED PENCIL

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why was the blonde fired from the factory? she ate the maneger's fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Have you seen Hellen Kellers mon?... Neither has she

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops