What's sad about a dead person? He was my friend.

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What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhoea

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Punching a baby

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what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

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What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

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what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

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Why did Sidney drop her ice cream? A refrigerator fell on er

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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Two octopuses are swimming in the ocean. Suddenly a scuba diver spots one of the octopus. The octopus looks at the human and swims away.

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Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

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where did susan go durring the explotion? every where...

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- Knock, knock - Who's there? - Police - I'm not home!

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Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

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Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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My title of old was Satan. You humans killed my brother, ending God the holy trinity`s stay on earth, the Gods Omega. Moral: And yet you call ME? THE ANTICHRIST?!? I OFFERED HIM WATER! YOU OFFERED HIM TORTURE AND DEATH!

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ur mum

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A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'" Then the mother, realizing how her son could later become confused, clarified. She said, "You can say you have to pee as long as you say it in a quiet voice." The boy understood. There were no problems afterwards.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny your son let me in mom! Son, I have something to tell you. What? Well, you're actually adopted *sobs*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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