How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

I hate it when people talk about concentration camps... my grandad died in one He fell off the guard tower

What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

How do you start a fire in the woods? Call Cole Ryder!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What else is new?

So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

Why was the woman?

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender does not ask about its facial characteristics, because he is wondering why there is a horse standing in his bar.

Who invented chocolate? I don't know! Keep it to yourself.

Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

what did one wall say to another wall? nothing walls cant talk

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

What is yellow and bright? The sun.

How many babies can you fit in a toilet? To be exact you would have to do all this math, so I tested it out myself and got 7.6.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...