What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

Your mother lives so loosely that she has several terminal diseases and only has 3 weeks to live.

What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

long in the tooth!

Aaaaakkkkkiiiiiinnnnfffffeeeeennnnnwwwwaaaa

your mums so fat that shes HUGE!!!!

What did the virgin say to the car salesmen? Hello, I'm really interested in buying a car today.

Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? statutory rape

How many gay people does it take to make a football team? 11

if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

Q: What's better than the Call Me Maybe video? A: A shot-for-shot parody of it featuring a GIMP! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFxnAITCv5o

What did the Jew say right before a boy threw a quarter in a fountain? Make a wish.

whats white and sticky glue

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being raped What's worse than being Raped. Being Raped 2 times by a Giant Scorpion.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He had nobody to go with :)

What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? Hope.

Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

When I was just a little kid, my daddy lest the house and we all joined him to wherever he wanted to live.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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