Two men walked into a bar. I'm surprised the second man did not duck out of the way.

A black man has a job.

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

Knock Knock! whos there? Me! I kill you!

Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

Choir.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

Roses are red, violets are red, everything's red... Retinal haemorrhage.

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

How do you make a black man cry? Stab his wife.

why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

Fine Nero, but I will be keeping an eye on you.

A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Well, I couldn't understand them... It's hard to pronounce anything clearly when your mouth is full, which is why you don't eat and speak simultaneously.

You Know what worse than having 10 Kids? Having Eleven

A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he saw a Vladimir Putin.

what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...