Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

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Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

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why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

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???????????? WTF?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

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A fat man takes a crap, it looked like something a rhino would curl out.

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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Why are black people more athletic than whites? Black people originate from Africa, where they lived in a world where athletic ability created natural selection. The most athletic were able to escape dangers of the jungle such as dangerous animals, and were also most apt to find food to survive. Then when the slave trade occured, only the strongest and best fit survived the trip to America and the hard labor. Also, given the socio-economic trends of the United States, African Americans are more likely to grow up in an environment where they have limited opportunity to make a living, besides professional sports, so they play cheap sports like basketball.

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What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

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A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

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Why is the black boy made fun of at school? Because the kids at his school are racist.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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