What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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So there's this boy who really love clowns. His room is adorned with circus and clown posters and his one dream is to go to a circus and see a clown. One day he sees an ad in the newspaper for a circus that was headed toward his town. He begged and pleaded to his parents to let him go, and when they finally agreed he was ecstatic. The boy was in awe of all the things that the circus held, elephants, lions, tightrope walkers and trapeze artists, but there was nothing he was more excited for then the main show with the clowns. He took a seat and out came the clown on a unicycle. The boy was having the time of his life, when the clown suddenly called for someone from the audience. The boy immediately ran to the center of the stage. The clown asked the boy "Are you a horse's head?" then held the mic to the boy. "No," he replied. "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" The crowd erupted in laughter and the boy was mortified. He ran out of the circus tent and vowed never to return. He grew up with a hatred for clowns and even had to see multiple therapists. 30 years passed and the boy was now a man. The man looked in his morning paper, only to see that a circus was in town. He decided he would visit one last time. There it was, the elephants and tightrope walkers. And then he saw it, the same clown from 30 years ago in the same show. He walked up and the clown asked the same questions. "Are you a horse's head?" "No." "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" Then man the took the microphone from the clown and said, "Screw you clown."

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Why is the sky blue? Because when you look up at the sky, especially during the daytime, the sky is giving a bluish color.

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hi, im sober.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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am i invited to party? no

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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What kind of party doesn't have cake? The Nazi Party.

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Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

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SNAPPLE!

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Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

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What's worse than finding ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees

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Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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