What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

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What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

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Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

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Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

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Oh

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A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

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Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

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oliver is gay. so much so that he has hex with other men and dosent mind it very much

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

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Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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