If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the little child orphan with no arms or legs get for christmas? CANCER and for his birthday A.I.D.S. R.I.P little orphan

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a dog ate my homework but then he returned it on the lawn

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A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and then the mushroom walks out.

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What do you call a scottish drunk? a taxi

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Q: How do you call a group of animals? A: Llama.

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What's worst than realizing your mom is actually a transvestite? Simultaneously realizing this means you are adopted

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What did the president do for the people? ...

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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What's the difference between Wolfjob and a Jew? Wolfjob is attractive.

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Knock Knock! Whos there? The Game!

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I couldnt remember who Rhiana used to date. Then it hit me.

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How do you get a clown to shut up? Hit him in the face with an axe

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A white man walks down an alley and sees two black men. They say hello and then are on their way.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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I used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now.

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What do you call this? A sentence in English.

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Pain Olympics.

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Why did the door close? Because I closed it.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A. Why did the man crash the car? B. Because the driver was a blind man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops