roses are red violets are blue i am bipolar so am i

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What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

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So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

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Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was high.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

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Why was the anti-joke poster offended by all of the thumbs down? Because he didn't understand the concept of an anti-joke and instead submitted a childish, racist, incoherent lame 'joke'. This filled him with angst because he is uneducated and doesn't respond well to criticism.

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What did the terminally sick child dream of? I dont know. He never woke up to tell me.

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A white man on his way to happens to sit next to a black man the following conversation involves a democrat and a repuplican arguing about obama's current presidentcy and the wallstreet journal the two do not agree on both sujects and part ways...the white man is later brutally murdered in his own house infront of white and children in an unrelated incident. We should all help to stop violence in our local nieghborhoods.

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Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

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all hail based mark

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Q: Why did George Lopez walk into a Taco Bell? A: To purchase a 5-layer Gordita Burrito

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roses are red violets are too im bleeding

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Thumbs up if you're reading this in 2015!

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

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How did the drug addict die? He got shot in a drive-by.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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