A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Sure. A: Do you want to hear a short one or a long one? B: uh... a short one. A: joke. Do you want to hear a long one? joooooooke.

A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

Q. What happened when a man went to a bar? A. Nothing, The bar was closed.

What made Chuck Norris cry? Stubbing his toe

What is worse than getting stung by a wasp? Getting raped by a sexually frustrated bear.

why are you reading this? You are bored out of your mind and don't want to do you're homework. and now that you read this, you will realize what you're doing and will now get back to work.

a man walked into a bar....

Why did Mary fall off the swing. She had no arms Knock knock Whis there Not Mary.

Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

Why didn't the Jew laugh at the joke concerning his familial genealogy in relation to WW2? He had orofacial paralysis and was therefore physically incapable of expressing joy through the means of his mouth

Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

nock nock who's there? bob bob who? bob franklin let me in 'cause i'm freezing!

Logan's gay

Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He's dead now.

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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