Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

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The Awkward moment when the world doesn't end

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What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

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What's big, red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

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What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

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are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

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What did the Arab do when he got frustrated? Burned himself

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What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

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What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

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2 Black men walk into the bar.. Guess what? There still black.

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There was a guy and a girl naked in bed, sleeping together. When they woke up they didn't remember the last 72 hours and wanted some questions answered, including Where am I? Who are you? What year is it? What's my name?

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Women's rights.

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Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

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A boy tells his friend a 9/11 joke. The boy's friend says "Don't joke about 9/11, my dad died in it." "I'm sorry I didn't know.", responds the boy. "Yeah, that's the last plane he ever flew"

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What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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like if u think princess kenny is the fairest maiden in all the land. if u dont, disregard this message.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Boy 1: Hey do you want my last chewing gum? Boy 2: Yeah please! Boy 1: Same. The boy continues to eat the chewing gum and finishes his shit wandering why the boy walked into the same cubicle as him.

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a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

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Women don't need an education. The only book they need is a recipe book.

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Sometimes I question my sanity... Occasionally it replies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops