Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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Your mother is so fat, that if she had 8 clones of her, they would probably not be able to stand in the elevator together due to the maximum capacity, and safety hazard.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

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What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

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What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why is a frog green? Because it was born that way

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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do you no what im doing? writing this joke.

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why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

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What does a Jew and an oven have in common? Bagels.

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How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

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Why was the man whistling? He was calling his friend.

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Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

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Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

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Potassium? K.

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How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A dozen burly firefighters ready to stick it in your pooper

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What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops