What do Japan and Haiti have in common? They are both islands.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a man floating in a pool with his arms chopped off? A murder victim.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. And you said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black man burned down my house. It was on minecraft you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar And doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Lil' Wayne

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops