How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

Q: If you are running a race and a fridge hits you, how many dogs play x-box in the snow? A: 12 orange waffles

Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

What did the fat guy say after his weight-reduction surgery? I'm gonna sue the clown pants out of McDonalds

Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

cancer

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

A man walks into a bar... OW!!!

What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side??? Yeah he's all right now!!!

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

Whats the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? Ghosts aren't dolphins.

Holocaust jokes suck. Anne frankley, I won't stand for them

Why did the blind boy cross the road? Why? The world may never know. He was hit by a bus

So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

what happens when a panther and a gorilla fight? i dont know i never seen it before.

What did mr smith say when a student asked for math help? ok

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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