Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -117

*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

thumb_up thumb_down +204

Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What kind of party doesn't have cake? The Nazi Party.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: What did Micheal Jackson Say to the boys? A: He can't speak because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

thumb_up thumb_down -28

how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops