A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -130

You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Tony Blair, Micheal Jordan, Fabrice Muamba, Aunty Josephine, Nick Clegg, David Cameron, and myself all go out for drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

A married man takes the ring off his finger.

thumb_up thumb_down +118

What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the boy fall down? he was shot

thumb_up thumb_down +14

The sons of modern psychology: COCAINE MOTHERF8CKERS! COMING OUT IN YOUR CINEMA RENTAL STORE YESTERDAY! Sold out. (yesterday)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops