What does a muslim do on a plane? Flies to his intended destination without causing a problem.

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Dear God, That wasn't cool. Seriously. From, Japan

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One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

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What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

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roses are red and violets are in fact violet

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Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

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What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

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An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

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Andrew's a bald wankstain.

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A boy walk in. What did you think I was gonna add "into a bar"? Also, boys under the age of 21 aren't allowed to drink.

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My penis is big... not.

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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Why did the man talk to the potato? Because hes stupid.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

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What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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Knock knock Who's there Banana Bananas can't talk. Crap he's on to me

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he’d rather be road kill, than be in the KFC right across the street,inside a kids meal,dead.

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How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

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roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

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Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, but the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk!

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Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

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Two crabs are standing on a wall. One of them falls down. The second one's name is Georges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops