When I find out where you live I'm going to burn down your house, kill your family, and while your crying in you demise I am going to slit your throat.

A kangeroo is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many waffles does it take to get to the moon? NO, silly. Snakes don't have armpits.

Who keeps his best friend in a gun rack? a red neck.

what happens when a white guy goes to harlem he gets robbed by 5 to 10 black men

What is the difference between a Mexican man and a bench? The Mexican man is a human being, thus being sentient and able to partake in social activities, such as receiving education, meeting people, getting a job, raising a family, and getting somewhere in life. The bench cannot do anything. It is inanimate and is meant to be sat on.

who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

YOLO You only like Oreos

Nock nock Whos there? The mailman, I have a package for you. Thank you.

Cameron is a r e t a r d

A horse walks in a bar. The barman asks: "Why the long face?" The horse replies: I have aids.

Why did Lance Armstrong lose the race? Which race?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

Why was the little boy's hair messed up on picture day? Because he was brutally stabbed in the face.

Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

What did PSY say about his newest song? Probably something in Korean.

How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. They have been planning a girls night out for weeks.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when i jump on a trampoline.

What is long and black? The line at KFC

I was bitter, nonetheleast because you and I became friends, while someone working for you (at that time it might just as well had been you) was conducting a lot of illegal activities. I kept thinking, why does the guy call himself "the wizard", its the most used name... Why? Because it is the most used name, good luck finding "THE WIZARD" among internet nerds, but then again, if you search for the most famous one, you find "THE MAN", Not only did you tell me at first that you where Nero. Which I can prove you are not, but you know, one side of me was your friend, the other knew I would have to get rid of you no matter the cost, if you kept your activities. SImply put: When I enjoyed our time together, I pushed you away with stupid humor, small insults and etc, mostly in order to protect myself from getting to close with a potential threat for well, security, lets keep it at that.

What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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