Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

What did the grape do after it was stepped on? Nothing, as it was incapacitated, and even under normal circumstances, it would be incapable of performing any voluntary actions as it is only a grape.

Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

Guess what. Chicken butt.

Why did Moses part the sea Because it was divisible by 2

A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

What did the chemist say when his BBQ ran out of charcoal? Nothing interesting.

You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon.

Why did the blonde turn red Because some one lit her on fire

I walked into my sister's room and slipped on a bra..........it was a boobie trap

A man scratches his ankle and says " my nuts are itchy" a woman looks at him questionly. realizing he had been watched, he lifted the bottom of his pant leg and showed to woman that he had stuffed his socks with pecans.

An american man, chinese man, black man, and a Mexican man walk into a bar. The american man says i want to show you guys a trick, so they go to the empire state building and the american man jumps off the side and comes back up alive. He tells them i will do it one more time, watch closely. So he jumps off and comes back alive. The american guy tells the chinese man to do it. So the chinese guy jumps off and dies. Then the american guy tells the mexican to jumps off, sonhe does it. The mexican man dies and the black guy is told to do it and he is afraid, but still does it, he dies. The american man goes back to the bar and the barkeep says "Superman you can be a real dick when your drunk!"

I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

Why are black people so tall? Jesus was also black and therefore gives black people some favorable traits.

Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

whats black and blue and has three legs? An abused deformed person.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was no oncoming traffic.

Are you related to Yoda? because yoda-licious!!!!

A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

Roses Are Red Violits Are Blue Screw it RUN!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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