4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

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Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dont know, you ask it.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

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Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

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What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

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Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

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Asians

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What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

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facebook is like a refrigerator. you eat it.

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What happened as a result of the bitter terrorist attack? The president began to devise a plan to help the abused child

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Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

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Why is the ground wet It rained

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Roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry show me your tits!!

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What did the kid say when his parents were killed? Nothing. He's a vegetable

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area.

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What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

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knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

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roses are red violets are blue I'm ADHD oh look, a squirrel

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a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops