What do you call a blonde who likes to read? A bookworm.

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What do you not want to call a african american that begins with an N and ends with an R? A Neighbor!

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Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

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"Lady's and Gentlemen, hobos and trams Cross side mosquitoes and bald legged ants Pull up a chair and sit on the floor and I'll tell you I've never heard before Of one bright day in the middle of night Two dead boys got up to fight Back to Back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other A deaf policeman heard the noise Came and killed the two dead boys If you don't believe this lie is true Ask the blind man he saw it too"

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for her birthday? A S.T.D

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Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

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What did the wife say to her husband when he arrived home from work? Nothing. She cried over his coffin. Her husband was a marine who died in a car bombing in Iraq.

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i love weed i fuc king really do i fuc king love smoking weed with you.And i love a fat spliff and i love a fat bong why cant we all just sing along!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? ... ... He committed suicide for the simple reason that the soviet and allied forces were closing in on him and he knew that he did not stand a chance of winning the war.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

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Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

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Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

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What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

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So there were two... sigh... I hate my life....

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Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Where can you find elephants? That depends on where you leave them.

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What's circular and round A circle

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house. Just kidding. Micky Mouse isn't real.

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Why did Mufasa miss his doctor's appointment? Because he was trampled to death by wildebeest

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops