Have you ever had Ethiopian food?

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If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

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What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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Why was the Microsoft fan happy? Because Steve Jobs died.

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"33"

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? Because he was mentally handicaped

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

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Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

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Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

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Why couldn't the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

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How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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