"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

Why did the policeman arrest the black man? He had commited a crime and murdered somebody.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

Why did the person post a real joke with bad grammar and spelling on anti-joke.com? They didn't flippin' understand the point of the website.

The sons of modern psychology: COCAINE MOTHERF8CKERS! COMING OUT IN YOUR CINEMA RENTAL STORE YESTERDAY! Sold out. (yesterday)

What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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