whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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Q: Whats better than 10 baby's nailed to 1 tree. A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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How did the black man get a new television? He worked hard and put away a small percentage of his weekly wage in order to save for this new addition to his household.

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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So you there Red?

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Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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