A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

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What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

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Whats the difference between a prostitute and crack dealer? One sells addicting drugs, while the other exploits her vagina for money. Either way, they're both illegal.

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What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

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Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

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What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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knock knock who's there? dave dave who? dave suddenly burst into tears as his grandmothers altzimers became so serious she forgot his name

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What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

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What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

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3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dont know, you ask it.

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How do black men eat chicken? Chicken goes in bone come out.

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What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

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What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

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What are we ? Students ! What do we want ? Six months holiday ! When do we want it ? Twice a year !

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Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

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What happened to your hamster? It died.

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What crime does a tree commit in order to be sent to prison? Trees on.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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Beans, beans good for the heart, the more you eat the more likely you are to grow into a healthy young man/woman with low risk of heart disease.

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Whats the worst part of your school burning down? A: The burnt pizza.

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How do you say cabbage in Spanish? You don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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