Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

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Hey Eliza, thanks, while I appreciate the help, Alice is crying in a corner and refusing to get up, I wont lie, for a moment there I could "see voices and music" and valium has taken care of the ptsd (and blown most of my brain, which is nice for a change). With that said, im on 40 mg ritalin which is a lot, but I need it, besides I can handle the anxiety. I have no idea who the guy typing this is, but he is following me to the letter, so thats good enough, except his typos being worse than mine, which is pretty good for a guy that barely speaks english. Sorry Eliza, but Alice is having a breakdown here, ill talk her down a bit first, she tries to hide it, but she is far more worried about me than I am, which is nice, just not like this, ill be right back with you.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

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What's worse than the Holocaust? People trying to be funny writing the same jokes over and over.

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Autism speaks but not really

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

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what is racecar backwards in reverse

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What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

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What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

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Gay jokes arn't funny. "Come" on guys.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

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look under under where under under where. under the couch

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The joke below this comment is stupid. Lets go Mets

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Stephen Hawkins walks into a bar...

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Why did little Sally throw a stick of butter out the window? Sally has a burning hatred for dairy products.

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A horse walks into a bar. The Bartender says "Why the long face?" The Bartender is then put into a lunatic asylum for hallucinating and trying to communicate with said hallucinations.

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The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

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What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich? A sandwich doesn't scream when I put my salami in it.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

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Mullets

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They should introduce a filtering system on here. That way any repeated jokes, or idiots taking up a page with a copy and paste routine, could be simply erased by those who are bored with them or find them irritating. [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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